Airport dates

I'm sitting in a leather chair next to Eric, waiting to fly out to Chicago. We've been here for a few hours waiting for a flight that was supposed to take off 45 minutes ago...before it was delayed to the same time that we should have been landing in Chicago.

Typically, this situation would piss me off. I don't like traveling - not to be read as I don't like places. I like places, I hate getting there.

Maybe it's the Christmas season or the Starbucks finally kicking in, but I'm shockingly okay with this.

Eric and I have been really busy lately, and it's been a busy that has resulted in us spending Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday nights separate. We're definitely thankful that our schedules have been picking up and that we're enjoying all we've got going on, but honestly, by the time Thursday and Friday roll around, we're super tired from the first half of the week and we don't really think about putting energy into spending some quality time together. And looking into the new year, it's only going to get busier.

Quality time together in a marriage, even without kids, is harder than it sounds. This is something we've talked a few times about recently, and something we're both working towards. For us, it means eating more meals together, even if it's grilled cheese before I head to volleyball. It means talking in bed until neither of us can form coherent words. It means using commercial breaks to give Eric hugs and kisses while he programs and I watch The Mindy Project.

So tonight, I'm actually a little thankful for the extra time we've spent in the Kansas City International Airport. It's quieter here than usual, and we've caught up on things - devising a plan to buy black tights because I forgot mine in the dryer, finding a slip cover for our couch, why sleeping with our down comforter is a blessing (it's super warm and fluffy) and a curse (it's super warm).

Cheers to taking advantage of unexpected time together.

A simple marriage lesson

My husband and I are insanely different. Computer programmer who claims he is allergic to the sun. Communication fanatic that miserably sweats poolside for hopes that swimsuit lines will become a little more distinct.

We're different. Which brings a unique challenge to our marriage.

Since we spend a majority of our time together, we've had to work extra hard at finding things we both like to do. I know I'm crazy, but E spending his time being a genius in our office while I watch TV all night long is not my exact picture of bliss.

Enter, the brilliance of Starbucks dates.

A month or two ago, we started this thing where, every Thursday, after work, we go to Starbucks as a way to wind down from the week and prepare for the weekend. Sometimes, we bring our computers and work on things (like this blog post), other times, we sip our frappuccinos and laugh at each other for being ridiculous.

We learned in marriage counseling that having a designated date night or activity you do each week does great things for the relationship. I'm here to tell you with my words that it really does. I love looking forward to my Starbucks date with E, even if we're a little ticked at each other. If we have something that needs to be worked out, it's a neutral spot. And if we're really feelin' the love that day, we gaze into each other's eyes, hold hands and make everyone else throw up in their mouths with how in love we are. (So much fun.)

For all my married/dating friends, and for those feeling like a specific friend is missing from their life, schedule something like this. A walk around the neighborhood. Ice cream runs. Something where your attention is directed to the person you're spending time with. Give that relationship the priority it needs by designating and dedicating time each week to that person. It works wonders.



My smarty-pants love, hard at work.



Such a hipster, with his side-part and v-neck. And I love it.

4 things I didn't know about myself

Count the months, peeps, because E-dizzle and I have been married for 4 big ones. We’re basically experts.

I like to think that we’re out of the honeymoon stage, but I still get the “No, you’re definitely not” response when I tell people that. I actually like to think that we skipped it altogether because I want to believe that E and I keep it pretty real, but people tell me that’s not true, either. Why on Earth is no one letting me have my cake and eat it too?!?!

Because I like to think that I’m a pretty reflective person (us communicators tend to be), I was simultaneously doing the dishes and thinking about my four experience-filled months of marriage.

And then my brain got interesting. I realized mid fork rinsing that I’ve learned a few things about myself since being married. Just when I thought I had me all figured out…

1. The chance of me having a slight obsessive-compulsive complex is no longer a chance; it’s fact. You wouldn’t think it matters how one stores their toilet paper, but oh baby, it does. And you think there’s more than one way to make the bed? How dare you. There’s one way, and it’s my way (hello, 5-year-old brat me).

Let’s give credit where it’s due. To my husband, you are way too patient and gracious. 

2. I can be a woman of double standards. But only when it comes to cleaning. I think. Like, I’ll ask the hubby to help me clean, but I’ve always got some critique with his methods. What is wrong with me?

3. I work against myself. I always complain that Eric and I need to eat healthier, but then I make things like stromboli. Or steak. Or the Cinco de Mayo spread I talked about here. I’ve threatened myself and E with eating salad for an entire month, but let’s be honest – we won’t. And so I’ll just continue my method of eating what I want and working out the bare minimum so I don’t blow up like a balloon. And E will just keep eating, because his metabolism is crrraaazzzy.

4. I may become a cat person. Not that I was ever anti-cat. I’m just more pro-dog. What really matters is that I’m really just anti-animals in the house. It.will.never.happen. The only exception is a fish. Or a labradoodle, if I ever get one. I can't even explain how much lint/animal hair drives me crazy.

Anyways, we’ve agreed that we will have pets when we have a backyard and outdoor pet homes for them to stay in. But when it came to species, we differ. E = cats, me = dogs. But I’m warming up to the idea of cats, and I proudly admit it’s because of the Internet’s gift of lolcats. I can has cheezburger? GENIUS. Thank you, Lolcats, for giving Eric and I random 15-minute spurts of classic entertainment.

The cat that began it all.

I weirdly hope I’m done learning things about myself for a while. But then again, maybe I’ll discover I’m the missing link to the Avengers being more awesome, or that I’m a closet wine connoisseur. But then, I’d have to drink something else besides Moscato or Reisling, and that’s just not happening. 

"Don't take tomorrow to bed with you."

Norman Vincent Peale said that.

One of my uncles (we'll call him 'C') called me earlier this afternoon to catch up real quick. Uncle C is another one of my favorite relatives...if I had favorites. He's smart, very driven, successful, a great Christian and has a super-awesome family. C has spent the past few months trying to find me a job, and today he called with another opportunity just in case I wasn't liking my newest arrangement (I told him I am, and he spared me the lengthy pitch).

And then we really got to talking.

I've been extremely blessed to have wise family members. My parents are definitely a few, but I've got some really great grandparents, aunts and uncles. As C asked me how being married, having a new job and life in general was, I confronted him with something I've been thinking about for a while - can life in fact be too good?

I feel like E and I have started off a little backwards. We both have been fortunate enough to land some pretty great jobs, we love where we live, we have infinitely-beyond-awesome families and we have each other. I've heard so many stories of people's first year of marriage that I was quite scared thinking about what mine would be like.

So I told C, a little bit jokingly, that I'm just waiting for something not great to happen - that it feels like things have started off too good. And then C taught me a lesson that neither of us had scheduled in our Outlook calendars.

Life has its bad moments. Some will be minor, and some will seem like there's no recovery. Those are facts we can't escape. But if there's one thing either of us have learned from another awesome uncle, it's that life is way too short to wait around for the downs. I don't know why I'm programmed to stress about things I have no idea about. My husband has assured me that, even though he is a computer programmer, I cannot be un-programmed (something about me not being a computer).

I invite you, dear readers, to partake in a challenge with me. It's more of a life journey (ye-ah, we're that close already). If you're like me, and you like to stress about silly, important things that you have no idea if they'll even happen, don't. Practice with me a mentality that relishes in every day's blessings, a way of thinking that steers clear of worrying about tomorrow, or next week, or five years from now.

*I dedicate this post to all of my fellow college grads, because thinking about the future is scary. And not thinking about can be even scarier.

Oh, the places you'll go.

Hopefully that title brings back great memories of this book - it's definitely a must-read/must-own/must-keep-forever.

Theodor Seuss Geisel, courtesy of rocketboom.com
I think he would have been pleased with my picture selection.

Today is Dr. Seuss's would-be 108th birthday, and for someone whose books we've all grown up read and love, I had to find some way give him the proper dedication. (If only I still had my Cat in the Hat hat.) What I'd like to do is share the entire book on my blog (because it really is that good), but I'm pretty sure that's illegal. So, here's one of my favorite excerpts.

But on you will go

though the weather be foul.

On you will go

though your enemies prowl.

On you will go

though the Hakken-Kraks howl.

Onward up many

a frightening creek,

though your arms may get sore

and your sneakers may leak.

On and on you will hike,

And I know you'll hike far

and face up to your problems

whatever they are.

You'll get mixed up, of course,

as you already know.

You'll get mixed up 

with many strange birds as you go.

So be sure when you step.

Step with care and great tact

and remember that Life's 

a Great Balancing Act.

Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.

And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And will you succeed?

Yes! You will, indeed!

(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)

We do lots of things because we can, and many things we do because we're told we can't. There are a lot of times where we feel we've got the whole world behind us, and probably more where we feel left behind. The secret and beauty is that success is never out of question and always within reach. 

How does this apply to marriage exactly? Too many ways for me to fit on this blog. But, if you're looking for one, I did tell E that I will use our future kids as an excuse to go on a Dr. Seuss binge. He's cool with it.